Big Feelings, Small People: Teaching Kids to Name and Tame Emotions

The Link Between Language and Emotional Control

Emotional literacy means being able to recognise, understand, and talk about feelings. Children who learn to put their emotions into words often find it easier to manage those feelings. This is because naming an emotion helps their brain move from reacting automatically to thinking things through. Simply put, teaching children to name their feelings gives them a helpful guide to handle big emotions when they arise.

Tools to Teach Kids to Name Their Feelings

Parents and educators can support emotional literacy in many practical ways:

● Emotion charts and faces: Visual tools showing different feelings help children connect words with facial expressions.

● Storytelling and role play: Books and pretend scenarios allow children to explore emotions safely and practice naming them.

● Feelings check-ins: Regularly asking “How are you feeling?” normalises emotional awareness and expression.

● Emotion thermometers: These tools let children rate the intensity of their feelings, helping them recognise early signs of overwhelm.

● Modelling and co-regulation: Children learn a lot about handling emotions by watching how the adults around them respond. When caregivers stay calm and gently guide a child through strong feelings, they help the child develop confidence and strategies to manage emotions independently.

Using these tools consistently builds children’s emotional vocabulary and awareness, setting the stage for better self-regulation.

When Emotional Outbursts Signal a Need for Support

It is normal for children to have occasional emotional outbursts and experience big feelings. However, when these moments happen frequently or become overwhelming, making it hard 1 for a child to engage, communicate, or connect with others, it can be a sign that they need extra support. If your child finds it challenging to calm down or express what they are feeling, professional guidance can provide tailored strategies. Early support from a psychologist can help build on your child’s strengths and teach skills that promote emotional regulation and wellbeing.

How Psychologists Guide Emotion-Focused Interventions

Psychologists use a range of evidence-based approaches to support emotional development, including:

● Cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT): Teaching children to identify thoughts and feelings and develop healthy coping strategies.

● Mindfulness and relaxation techniques: Helping children learn to calm their bodies and minds in moments of stress.

● Parent coaching: Guiding caregivers on how to model emotional literacy and respond supportively to children’s feelings.

● Collaborative problem-solving: Empowering children to find solutions to emotional challenges with adult guidance.

Helping children recognise and express their emotions is an important step toward building emotional confidence and resilience. With the right tools and support, children can grow in confidence and learn to navigate their feelings in healthy, empowering ways.

References:

Siegel, D. J., & Bryson, T. P. (2011). The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind. Bantam Books.

Brackett, M. A., Rivers, S. E., & Salovey, P. (2011). Emotional intelligence: Implications for personal, social, academic, and workplace success. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 5(1), 88–103.

Denham, S. A., & Burton, R. (2003). Social and emotional prevention and intervention programming for preschoolers. Springer.

National Scientific Council on the Developing Child. (2004). Children’s Emotional Development Is Built into the Architecture of Their Brains. Harvard University Center on the Developing Child.